Who wants to bury a millionaire?
I do.
I hate rich people. Not because they are spoiled, or because I am jealous, but because they are useless.
Don't get me wrong, I appreciate money. Being permanently broke is no fun at all, and having to scrape and scheme to pay the bills totally sucks. I hate having no money, and only a liar would say they don't care about money.
I admit I always drool at prospects of a big money job. I would like to afford the finer things in life, like making my car work, buying good food instead of canned soup, owning 7000 albums. Being able to take a girl out to dinner, buy her flowers and candy and all that other crap. Money is a good thing to have.
But only a retard only cares about money. Its true that most of the good stuff in life comes at a price, for example food, booze, gas, smokes, gambling, disposing of corpses. But lots of good stuff is free, sex (theoretically), nice weather, good friends, dontshakethebaby.com.
The problem with money is that it is so damn good for solving problems that idiots think it is the solution to every problem. Some shit you can't buy your way out of, for everything else there's mastercard.
I am amused by the fact that a man or woman will pay $50 a month for a health club membership, work out 5 hours a week, then for the rest of every fucking day will ride elevators up or down 1 floor. Here's an idea, save $50, use the stairs moron.
If you go to a health club, it better be to live out the 1980's lifestyle and pick up chicks in front of the soloflex machine. Any other reason makes you a fool. You can get better exercise by running from rent-a-cops, jumping fences to escape guard dogs and hiding from enraged gang members. Fuck trying to sculpt your abs and start running to save your ass.
I like creative ways to avoid spending money by amusing yourself. Start up a backyard wrestling league, form a band, or print a crappy local zine. Better yet, fire up the old computer and make yourself an awesome website that no seems to want to tell their friends about.
All I want out of life is to pay the rent, eat the food and entertain the myself. As long as I have that and 10 million dollars I'll consider myself a rich man.