You know, we all will see some weird stuff from time to time.
I find that in life I will sometimes come across some things which are weird.
But there are some people I have met who find a whole lot more things a lot more weird than I do. That specific personality type has always kind of irritated me.
My thinking is that what a person considers is weird depends on a few things.
It seems to depend on what are the sorts of things that generally go on in the world around
a person that they can or can't understand.
Super stupid people think everything is weird, but not because everything is actually incomprehensible, its because they aren't able to understand it because they are dumb, lazy or not interested.
A bad example would be a like a teenage jock thinking things like broadway shows or the mathletes are weird.
Sure, they're lame and boring, but they make sense in their own way.
Crazy people also find way more stuff weird, but its because their brain doesn't work right.
So they don't recognize the differences between things in the world which are in fact normal and routine and the sort of things that
would fit their personal idea of routine things, like imaginary friends or paranoid delusions.
But! Some shit is really bizarre and downright inscrutable. So after that long and clumsy introduction to the concept, I am going to tell you some stuff that I personally find weird.
And you can either decide if you think its weird and doesn't make much sense to you either, or if the things that I think are weird are things that you actually get.
Then you can decide if I don't get it because I am dumb(I'm not) or, if you're the one who's stupid(probably).
So anyway here's an example of someone I find pretty weird. There was a girl I used to know, she was 20, blond, kind of pretty, she seemed sort of intelligent, and around as nice as any other person.
She was pleasant, sociable and she was able to have a normal conversation with others.
So from time to time when we were around each other we would get to conversating about this
or that, and I started to learn more about her personality. Which was when
the weirdness started to surface. Unusual discovery numero uno was that she considered herself highly religious.
This came as a shock because she revealed that detail of her personal life some time after telling me how drunk she got on the weekends with her boyfriend.
Her stories revealed that she generally spent her time drinking, smoking weed, screwing her boyfriend, and generally partying in general full blast like a 20 year old hellraisin bitch!
My thoughts on that were; although that's not totally inconsistent with the
behaviour of certain kinds of 20 year old girl's, it seems largely inconsistent with being highly religious.
Anyway, that's not all. She also liked to travel, and for 6 months she went on a religious mission of some shape and manners, as far as I understood it.
Although, which particular church specifically she was working for at the time wasn't entirely clear, but my best guess was that it was a blond white church of some variety.
Probably christianity, or maybe ... judo-christianity.
Anyway, she also spent a stretch of time in India for some reason, I presume it was as a traveller.
In her case she was young, so I guess its alright. So, for some period of
time, maybe another 6 months? she was living India, doing what they call
'traveling'. Anyway, she lived in 'India' for a while.
It doesn't make at a lot of sense to me that going to India is somehow expected to make an idiot less idiotic.
There is no perceptible change that I see when the great white suburban kid adventurer returns.
Except in the case of a few, who while they were in India bought some clothes that look completely ridiculous.
But other than that I don't see them coming home with much else, and my hunch is that all they have accomplished is wasting 6 months somewhere else.
So anyway, one day this girl shows up dressed in an Indian dress, which kind of stands out when you're among normal western clothes.
When I first laid eyes on her outfit my exact thought was, you-must-be-joking.
A 20 year old white girl in Indian clothes, as far as she knew she could have been wearing the outfit of a hindu shopgirl, or hindu high priestess.
This is a danger in dabbling in other cultures blindly. You should probably try to learn the significance of the thing to that culture before you swipe it.
Like for instance your local neighborhood halfwits who got chinese characters as tattoos.
I for one respect the dignity of other cultures traditions, symbols, and outerwear.
So anyway, you won't catch me at the local movie theatre in a Disheke or kimono, sexy as fuck as
that might actually look, out of respect.
But not this girl. And it has happened more than once that she has been dressed that way.
Each time it happens I have to summon the concentration of a karate master to keep myself from laughing out loud.
What's the weird part? It isn't that she isn't smart enough to know better than to dress that way, because being dumb isn't weird.
What I can't understand is what makes her want to dress that way in the first place.
If I think about it I can come up with some possible reasons why, but ultimately the motives are confused and irrational.
I guess what I am saying is that is a decision I wouldn't make in a million years.
Now then, on another subject, another thing I don't understand is facebook.
For one thing, when I'm on the internet I am too busy seeing what's new on reptoids.com, mufon.com, and earthfiles.net.
I tried out that whole online friends business once already, back when myspace started up.
I was actually on myspace when it started and I committed myspace suicide since I didn't like it.
Very few of my long time friends ever joined myspace. But a shocking amount of them have gotten on to facebook.
How it happened that most of my friends deftly avoided myspace for all these years, only to somehow get reeled in by facebook is sort of puzzling.
I feel inclined to judge my friends as soft for getting involved in facebook.
But I better reserve my judgement on that because while I am writing this sentence I am doing something 1000 times more gay.
I am listening to Tulleycraft and writing on what might as well be a fucking blog.
By the way, if it is your experience that music like The Postal Service is a little too hard and
edgy for you, you might like Tulleycraft.
They make Dashboard Confessional look like Autopsy. The worst part is that when you listen to Tulleycraft, just by the
way it sounds you can tell the singer is smiling.
This is a fact that makes me want to drink a glass of fresh blood, just to get the taste out of my mouth.
But damn are Tulleycraft easy to listen to.
So anyway, I am not going to join facebook for the following reasons. If join one of two things is going to happen.
Possibility A: One possibility is that I will have all kinds of people from my past or who I barely know who want to be my
friend. I believe this is possible since I have gathered that one aspect of facebook is to collect and rank friends like
deposits in a social bank account.
This attracts me very little, since online friends are a valueless form of social currency more subject to inflation than a Zimbabwe Dollar.
So I'm not inclined to invest all the time and boredom into faking I care about all those strangers.
They are probably nice people, but friends are people who you phone and who
phone you.
People who are comfortable being listed as a person who knows you, who have decided that it is more a benefit than a liability to be known as someone who knows you, those people aren't your friends.
And a person's motive for wanting to be on that list have the prospect of being pretty fuckin weird.
So in possibility A, if I join facebook, I lose.
Possibility B: What is more likely to happen is that when I join facebook is I am going to find out more precisely
just how many people there are who don't like me.
You see my time interacting with other people in high society hasn't been entirely free of the occasional ... er ... unpleasantness.
There is more than one person who I am not too anxious to give the chance to look me up.
You see, in the opinion of some people on this planet I am either an asshole or a loser.
Basically, the less they know about me the better.
Most of the people who don't like me have pretty good reason, I should know, I gave it to them. I drink too much, run my mouth off, ignore people, and make an ass of myself
from time to time. I am not too worried about that I guess, because oh well, you can't make an
omelette without breaking a few eggs. So I forgive myself for my
occasional little social faux pas. But not everyone sees it that way.
And now people are all getting more connected, not just the people who I like, but also the spongebrains, dog faces, posers and fuckwits.
So in possibility B, if I join facebook, I lose.
Below I have added a graphical representation of this decision using a management decision tool known as an expected value decision tree:
As you can see, the bottom line is that my expected profit is 0 no matter what I
do, so I am not going to join facebook.
And, my personal philosophy is, if you can't join em, beat em.
Which means I gotta bounce out to my underwater laboratory to work up a whole new list of insults.
So I going to be staying up all night thinking up disses to keep ahead of the faceborg collective.
And I am unyielding in my decision to steer clear of loser internet socializing.
You're more likely to find me playing cranium with bigfoot and a leprechaun, or working at a unicorn ranch than on facebook.
So if being friends on the internet is the way things are headed, in two years the only friends I'm gonna have will be people who don't know how to use a computer.
What this means is I'll be hanging out with your Gramma at the Yarn store, where the word 'website'
receives about the same level of recognition whether you said it in klingon or english.