Terminator 3 was on TV yesterday, which was kind of a fun/depressing movie that builds on the usual scenario involving artificially intelligent robots. Man creates intelligent machine, machine kills man. It's all pretty familiar, in Battlestar Galactica it was the Cylons, in Blade Runner the replicants, in The Matrix it was the machines, in Small Wonder it was Vicki, etc, the examples go on and on. Robots attempt to wipe out people.
My favorite thing is the presumption that if the probably impossible thing happens and artificial intelligence resembling actual consciousness is somehow created by mankind, and then this miracle is somehow set loose and built into robots, the first thing they will do is rise up and kill the human race.
Well of course they will, why wouldn't they? It seems only natural. But ... even as reasonable as that sounds, I am unconvinced, for a few reasons. Firstly, we probably wouldn't build them factory equipped with laser cannons, buzzsaws, and brain scoops. They would probably come factory equipped with mops and brushes. You see, nobody is building killer robot missile scientists, they're building robot housecleaners. The simple reason for that is that no scientist is going to build a robot to do a job the scientist is presently getting paid to do. But, he will build a robot to do a job that he is presently paying a local human troglodite to do, like mowing, mopping, painting, etc. Anyway, you get the idea.
I think the fear of robot terminators is based on something subconscious. I think we just expect that a machine which becomes smart is going to take about 10 seconds to conclude that mankind is useless and must be exterminated. And sure, maybe it sounds sort of reasonable. If you look around with a cold impartial view at human beings, we pretty much look retarded, and we appear to be way more trouble than we're worth. And most of you people are. But, the reason that we all on some level think so lowly of mankind is because as humans beings we know ourselves too well. And familiarity breeds contempt. We think of mankind poorly because we have been around ourselves too long. Remember, at first a brand new robot won't be able to tell that we're useless, they barely know us. Until the novelty of human beings wears off, to a robot we humans will be totally awesome rad badical!
Seriously, as long as the robots don't see any NBC or CBS programming right away, they won't really have a reason to hate us. And as long as we just keep them away from the most retarded human inventions, such as films by Michael Bay, music by My Chemical Romance and shows like The View, we got nothing to sweat.
In fact I am willing to go further. My thinking is that at first robots will probably want to copy us, strutting down the street in fake Chanel, talking on bluetooth headpieces, living our lives on a maxed out Amex. Kickin fuckin ass! Gettin paid! Get Crunked!
I suspect that until our robot friends really get to know us they will probably think we're cool, and they will love us. And, if my hunch is right, before too long peer pressure will make them become just like us, and they will act just as dumb as we do.
Maybe the smarter robots will try and convince the rest of them to murder us, but the other robots will be like, "Hey Lore, why you being so negative?" and "Don't hate on the humans Calculon, that's just you and your own insecurities."
I firmly believe the mainstreaming effects of modern culture and the dumbing down to the lowest common denominator is something to which the robots will be just as succeptible. Most of the idiots I know are pretty much programmed automatons who live to follow simple instructions, I see no difference.
May their diodes blink into eternity. Cherry 2000, boo-yah!